I’m in the Utah Valley Symphony, playing 2nd fiddle to a lot of really fantastic musicians (no really, I actually am in the 2nd violin section, and most of the people in the group are talented enough that I truly am playing 2nd fiddle to them and I am totes okay with that). Anyway, we have a concert coming up.
As such, symphony rehearsals tend to go a bit lengthy and get a bit exciting when you’re in the crunch time before a concert. Our conductor is a fantastic musician and director, so the fact that he’s hilarious as well is a bonus. Here are some gems from tonight’s rehearsal:
- “Upper strings and winds, you’re supposed to be witches here. Play like witches! You know, with…pizzazz. Cause witches are full of…pizzazz.”
- “Jazzier! Jazzier! This isn’t Mozart!”
- “Cut, cut, cut. Um, hi. Rytting here. Rytting conducts. Please follow Rytting? Thank you?” (Rytting = his last name)
- “She is the soloist. That means the audience has to hear her. That means, you are quieter than her. That’s, you know, shhhhhh. Good? Good.”
- “Winds! What excellent sound effects you’re making! You’re sounding perfectly like Halloweenish demons!” (Note: this was a completely sincere compliment. They were supposed to sound like that.)
- “Oh, very nice, clarinets–so very Halloweeny.”
- “Folks, I need to tell you something. I think…I think Berlioz was on drugs. Maybe when he wrote this? So, you know, play like that. Do you know what that’s li–you know what? Never mind. I don’t want to know. Just imagine what you think that sounds like.”
Symphony’s fun, folks.
(p.s., if you’re in the Provo/Orem area, and available next Wednesday or Thursday, come to our concert at the Covey Center! We’re playing with all these amazing prodigy kids , plus the couple of Halloweeny songs mentioned above, so it’ll be a really fun time. And like serious, on the prodigy thing–check them out; they’re amazing. Or just talk to me if you’re interested–I might have a couple discounted tickets available.)
p.p.s. I definitely had to look up how to spell “pizzazz.” Who knew–it has four z’s?!?